How To Love Yourself

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This isn’t going to be one of those posts where I tell you that loving yourself is easy and everyone will get there at the same time in five easy steps. No, I am telling you that if you make a habit of being kind to yourself, in various ways, it comes to the point that you start respecting yourself and you start thinking you deserve nice things, it takes away the guilt or discomfort that  people say they feel when they get a compliment, and it just overall transforms your life. You have yourself in this world, and, if you are lucky (like I am), then you have your people who think the world of you too (whether or not they tell you every day – which, you know, they should because life is really short). But do you think the world of yourself? Do you wake up in the morning feeling worthy of what you have and what you want to achieve in your life? I do, and I want you to feel that way too. And that’s what this post is about. So, let’s get onto the habits that can help you learn to love yourself…

1. Have a self-care routine.

My self-care routine involves rubbing my favourite body oils into my skin, putting on a hair mask or a face mask, being physically active, getting my hair done…but it could be anything that feels right to you. It is important to actively show love to yourself in small or big ways because it sets the tone for how you respect and care for your yourself.

2. Take on a hobby.

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I had not played the guitar in years and my first guitar (the Vantage acoustic on the left of this image) was just sitting in its gig bag unplayed. I have been through a lot in my life, and the stuff that went through had caused me to not do some of the things that I am passionate about. However, I decided to change that. So, thanks to writing more often, being physically active, cooking more, and deciding to sign up for guitar lessons, I have so much more passion in my life, and I honestly feel the most passionate that I have felt in a long while. I used to sing in a choir, take organ lessons, and play the tuba  – in high school! So, I guess, music and that kind of learning were missing from my life. I am happy to have them back.

3. Use positive self-talk.

I am a living testament to the fact that if you say kind things about yourself (to yourself), then you will honestly start to overcome insecurities and start to see good things about you. For me, my insecurities were about my shape: I am curvy and thick – I always have been – and I had a hard time finding clothes that would flatter my kind of figure (and I didn’t know how to pick carefully and take my time – slow fashion is key!). So, what I personally did is I bought a bunch of lingerie, I looked at myself in the mirror naked and with it on, and I sang my praises. Of course, though I LOVE everything about me physically, I also sang praises about my insides – the stuff you can’t see when you look at me, such as my heart, my soul, my intelligence, and what have you. All of this is something that I still do pretty much every day, but it doesn’t feel like a chore in the way that it did when I was starting out with my positive self-talk. It feels natural now.

4. Take care of your health.

Yes, while I love my shape and my body overall, and while I often share my outfits on Instagram here, I see the value of taking care of your physical and mental health. So, I do that by seeing friends, living my life as joyfully as possible, and taking my healthcare to the next level by eating as well as I can and being as active as I can – without a specific number in mind, rather with a continued feeling of overall vitality and vigour in my mind and in my body.

5. Surround yourself with people who put a smile on your face.

Life is too short to be around people who stress you out and make you unhappy. Life is about getting through the tough times and savouring the good times, and in both instances, it is the quality of the people around you that make the difference.

Are there any other self-love tips that you would add? Let me know (in one way or another)!

– Adaora

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